Posted by LeonnieFM at 2:32 PM

Friends, thank you for visiting. I have moved everything and will post my future writings in:

There, both of my previous blogs will be put together. Some will be in English, some will be in Bahasa Indonesia especially for 3Popok which aimed for Indonesian readers, not necessary women.

See you all in LeonnieFM.com

The Boobs

Posted by LeonnieFM at 12:05 PM

"Talk about boobs? What to talk about exactly? Boobs are boobs!" was exactly what I had in mind when I found out I was tagged by Nindya a.k.a Kappa. *Sigh* OK, since she had done such a nice post when I tagged her previously on the 10 things viral project, let's talk about boobs now!
Boobs are just boobs. They are a pair of body parts I'm not so fancy about. I got them growing on my chest pretty late compared to most of my school mates back in junior high. I remember quite clear in my mind how the boys were so into girls' boobs back then. Some of them really noticed the growth of their favorite girls' boobs. Instead of just "discussing" about the size, they were also talked about the cover.

The cover was another story. Our boobs was not fully grown to wear bras so our mothers provided us with mini-sets. The boys examined very closely who had shifted from mini-sets to bras. They were pretty knowledgeable about the brands because to simply talk about colors would not be considered cool enough.

Boobs were the main reason why the line-up procession before entering the class was such a big fuzz. The boys were pretending of so many things and move around like some mad cows just to "coincidentally" touch or rub the girls. Pity, some girls were looking forward to what in their adult years now classified in sexual harassment.

I was certainly not their favorite, not close enough to be in their list. As a matter of fact, I was not considered someone who could actually grow boobs. I was listed among the boys. The little stat-board in front of the class room would add one more boy to the actual number and deduct a girl. "He" was me.

I wore mini-sets up to my second year of high school. The loose batik shirt could not let anybody tell my sex especially with that crew-cut hairdo which announced me a G.I Jane wannabe.
Oh, I hated my boobs back then. I wished they stop growing and I could somehow trans-gender myself. Fortunate for me, the boobs listened to my wish. They did not grow more than an A-cup size. My size was a 32A, I was also 22 kgs lighter.

A shocking moment concerning my own boobs happened when I had to buy some bras during my first pregnancy. The size I had to buy was beyond my comprehension. They were huge. I could not believe my boobs were that big but my weight was no less shocking too.

To gave birth changed me a lot including to my acceptance to my boobs. To watch a baby suckling milk from my boobs was beautiful beyond believe. I learned to take care of my boobs better than before. Make sure they were clean, etc, etc. There it was, the baby showed me why should I have boobs as female. Why were they so important. Many pregnancy books wrote about that fact and tried to picture the happiness a pair of boobs could bring to the life of a mom and her baby, and to actually experience it made me think the books were not accurate.

I never imagine a pair of boobs could bring me a deep sorrow. Not because they were not big enough to attract some silly boys. Not because their insignificant size changed my sex without any surgery. It was because they did not produced enough milk when Igo was just one month old. He had to totally depend on formula when he reached 3 months old. When we decided to stop to breast-feed Ilya due to the possibility of HIV infection, I cried for weeks in the toilet every time I had to trash the milk.

Now, after three kids and a plan of not having more, the boobs are just another body parts. But this time with some significant respects. They are not the body parts that made me a female but they certainly the body parts that made me whole.

Next task is to tag fellow bloggers, let me think................. :
Yemima, Sofia Kartika and Pico ! -- blog away fellas!

10 Habits & Facts about me

Posted by LeonnieFM at 1:37 PM

A homework I received from fellow blogger-mom, Desny. She's completely right by saying it wont be too hard to do, writing about self. For me the hardest is to decide to be completely honest or not to be too honest.
  1. I'm a queen of procrastination. Those who know me best will tell you it is appropriate to be listed number 1. I procrastinate everything, if it can wait another minute, why not. I fight it hard for those things concerning my kids. One thing I know for sure they can't be procrastinated.
  2. I love my kids; 3 angels sent from heaven to make my life matter. I'd go to hell and back for them. Dare me! -- Life now is ALL about them, even if it didn't appear to be.
  3. I'm a food-junkie. I love to eat. My favorite are Chinese & Italian. The creamier the better. If one have many variant I will choose that with seafood. But don't ask me to cook. I cook just to make all the ingredient cooked not tasteful.
  4. A social-net addict because I'm actually an anti-social. I used to love to secluded myself and ignoring people and whatever they're saying. I read books to ignore people and I started that habit since childhood. This is a fact I fight pretty hard for the last 5 years & my husband says I'm improving pretty well.
  5. My memory is terrible; short or long. Except if those are written & I read it. So yeah, I was kinda good in history & geography classes; if I gained low I must had procrastinated reading until it was too late to read.
  6. I'm a protester. I protest on many thing; ignorance, injustice, unfairness, lies & bad music. I can't help not to protest, so every time I must do it I will try to do it ethically. I may had failed few times, if it concerned you, kindly accept my apology.
  7. I'm easily touched/moved, easy enough to shed tears. Whether to watch an athlete given the medal or to see a baby injured. Ironically, I usually hide these kinds of tears, afraid of embarrassing myself. I often couldn't hide my tears when I'm angry.
  8. Beneath, I'm a detail+routine freak. So freak about them I expect my helpers to do things according to my details+routines. Learning sometime they know some practical things better than me, now I give them more room to do things their way. Maybe this is the root-reason why I love playing games such as Harvest Moon and Age of Empire (note to play HM this weekend!)
  9. I dream to (again) have my own business. Fajar & I dream of having our own book store. The dream includes of camping with the kids in the store once in awhile. Yep, with yellow bubble tent and hot choco!
  10. Indonesia 1.5 is my newest passion. It's my youth dream to be involved in something that can make a difference no matter how slightly to anybody. I really hope more people with the same unrest & passion of making a difference will join the group.
Desny said the next task is to forward this so-called homework to other fellow blogger. Those I write below, raise your hand! :
  • Nindya a.k.a kappachan; the Daft Punk lady, ruler of 205, a nice young lady I will watch blossoming.
  • Pico; dude I dare if you could manage to squeeze this between your schedule *digeplak*
  • Fajar Jasmin; the father of my 3 angels & dearest husband. I challenge you to think simple.
  • Ivan Sielegar; voluntarily taking this challenge. This is our chance to go back to his cool designed site. yay!!
  • My nice friend Hasanuddin Tamir, who's up for the challenge too. Happy writing, Mr. blogger-dad!
Anybody who feels like doing it too, don't forget to share the link!

  1. Desny's 10 Habits & Facts; where I got the challenge from. More of her friends listed there with their 10 things.
  2. Nindya & Fajar had written their 10 things & pass on the project to their peers. (happy blog walking fellas!) - 8-9/10/08
  3. Patvandiest, tagged by Fajar has written the "mandatory" project and also tagged his peers: Puspa, Rifie and Anima. - 10/10/08
  4. Puspa apparently had written her own post back in September 23. The tagging continues.
  5. Ivan Sielegar & Toni a.k.a Neofreko posted their 20 facts. Yup, 20.. coz they both are the people behind NavinoT.com. (note in your 2009 calendar; we'll be meeting Ivan in Jakarta!) - 11/10/08
  6. Anima, he shares 1 thing in common with me: we don't eat sambal! - 12/10/08
  7. Rifie, who will get married in two weeks with the man she loves - 12/10/08
  8. Chibialfa, tagged by Fajar has posted her good post. Read no 7 & 10, brave! - 14/10/08
  9. Fikri of Bloggingly, amazingly he's born just awhile ago in 1990 tagged by Navinot Team- 14/10/2008
  10. Rama, the notorious Rampok. tagged by Navinot Team - 14/10/2008
  11. Java Jive, he rarely agree to this type of invitation that's why he accepted Chibialfa's - 15/10/2008
  12. Daniel Hunt, who found it hard to stop at 10 after tagged by Chibialfa. - 15/10/2008
  13. Brett McGuire, who's always up for a bit of fun. Like Brandon, who tagged him. - 16/10/2008
  14. Lao Ocean Girl, she dreamed of marrying a chef as a kid. - tagged by Brandon - 15/10/2008
  15. Nadia Febina, she just realized that it is a lot harder than she thought it would be - tagged by Brandon - 20/10/2008
  16. Pico Seno, he said he's shy & open-minded. There are more of him - 01/11/2008
  17. Hasant, a friend who loves gardening and the handsomest person in his home. - 02/11/2008
  18. Venus, she wanted to do 100 instead of just 10, but stopped at 69. - 06/11/2008